08/15/04
The Eighties Bus & The Forgotten Moons

I'll treat these disconnected images all as the same dream, because for all I know they are. I didn't take any notes; these are just the images that stayed with me.

One part involved me getting ready to record my Saturday-night cartoons on Cartoon Network. In real life this is a very bothersome process since they don't air commercial breaks between the first few programs, and I have to flip tapes like a DJ switching disks. Well, in the dream I seemed to be having an abnormal amount of trouble. I can't recall all the details but I seemed to keep thinking a certain program was on at a certain time, then it wasn't, then I thought it was on at another time, then it wasn't, then it was on, and I wasn't ready, then I was ready and it wasn't on, then I would be recording and it wasn't the right program; things like that. Very irritating. But I know that in the end it turned out I hadn't actually missed my program (Dragon Ball GT?) after all--I think maybe it had been moved into a later time slot--so I didn't freak out. But it was still annoying.

It seemed to be before all this happened, but maybe it was in the midst of or slightly after it. Suddenly a bunch of relatives showed up--Grandma B. I'm pretty certain was there, and maybe uncles and aunts and such. Ma and Dad and my brother Eric were already here, but not Eric's wife or daughter; strange. :/ It's like he lived with us again so maybe he wasn't married. I was getting ready to record and all these people showed up and now I did not even want to leave my room! I think I started to step into the hallway and they all came walking into the living room so I went back in my room (or the bathroom?) to wonder what to do. Maybe my hair hadn't been washed yet so it was messy and I didn't want to be embarrassed, but I also just didn't want to be around them. "It just FIGURES that the moment I have to record, they all show up!" I groused to myself, hoping they would leave. But again it seems like that problem somehow resolved itself; not sure.

Scene switch. I was sitting on the couch in the living room now (it seemed to be nighttime and dark out all throughout this, with the lights on inside--for some reason I particularly remember our hardwood floor) and learned that two members of my family (now only Ma, Dad, and Eric were here)--either Dad and Eric, or Ma and Eric--were leaving somewhere together, like to go hunting or to learn how to hunt or something. And then the remaining relative--Ma or Dad--was getting ready to go somewhere else, though it also seemed to have something to do with hunting or camping. They didn't seem to be talking about this, so much as me getting a feeling; it's almost like I was invisible. I sat here and looked from one to the other (they had divided into the "groups"--two, and one--to get ready to go) and may have said aloud, "What about me??"

Truth was, I didn't want to go hunting or whatever. It was that time of the month (it is in real life), and I just do not want to go anywhere at that time. There was another reason I didn't want to go--maybe I wasn't ready or something--but I also didn't want to be left behind! They were ALL leaving me here, alone! I hated missing out on the fun, even if it wasn't really something I wanted to do, and I didn't want to do anything. I don't know how to explain it, it was just the idea that misery loves company, or something. I didn't want to do anything, but I didn't want to be left alone either! But they didn't even seem to notice me, and I didn't know how to state my case in any way that made sense--"Do you want to come along?"--"No! But I don't want you to go, either!"--you see what I mean. >_< So frustrating, and NOW I was finally getting very upset.

Scene switch. Now I was in the Wal-Mart parking lot with someone else, an older male; it seemed to be sunset or evening and we seemed to be seated atop something kind of high like a truck bed or something, kind of facing the store and watching this odd thing go past. Something had happened before this but I can't recall it; now there was either a train or a semi truck bed loaded down with a row of train cars or else buses, each of which represented a different decade of the twentieth century. They were all painted differently to best represent that decade and they seemed to be like those funky VW buses from the Sixties or whatever, with no extending front. I seem to recall one was army green, maybe with some camouflage--that might have been the Forties Bus. We started paying attention to these as they swept past in a circle (?--they were curving by), trying to make out which decade each one was from. I wasn't able to pick them out as I wished to as they went by too fast. :/ But I at last focused on one particular bus once I decided to look for a specific one, rather than at all of them. It was cotton candy pink with big prismatic blue streaks or swirls, kind of like stylized stripes on a racecar, along the sides. Before I thought it I received some sort of outside hint that this was the Eighties Bus, and then I looked at it harder and started nodding. "Yep," I said aloud, "that's definitely the Eighties Bus." The man with me agreed as it went past. With colors like that, it couldn't NOT be the Eighties Bus. O_o

Well, these things just kept going around really fast like somebody doing figure eights in the parking lot, and this is hard to explain and really vague, but I got some kind of ominous feeling that something bad was going to happen as a result of these sweeping by so fast. The driver was being negligent by driving so fast and perhaps the buses were all going to go flying off or would crash. I got the same feeling one might get of looking at an unsafe fair ride, and that was much what this was like. It was actually more than a feeling I got; it was like an outside thought being inserted into my head, like some other intelligence--almost like precognition. Like I said, hard to explain. :/ Maybe this is what happened with me receiving the knowledge about the Eighties Bus even before I identified it; it was kind of like an invisible, inaudible, omniscient narrator being nearby and inserting things into my thoughts. *shrug* Can't do any better than that, I'm afraid. In any case I watched these careening buses with a feeling of foreboding, but I was also very neutral about it, like I was just watching it on TV. "That guy should slow down," I thought, but that was about the extent of my involvement, or that of the guy with me. I don't know who he was or even what he looked like, I just sense he was there with me, he was at least slightly older, and maybe he was attractive. I know we were at least acquaintances because I didn't feel weird around him; I felt perfectly normal. We even sat side by side on the back of some other truck or metal structure several feet above the ground or something (I think my feet were dangling), watching together as this happened. (I think of black metal bars--forming part of what we were sitting on.) There was just this sense of impending catastrophe with the additional feeling that this was something that could be avoided--thus adding to the feeling of doom--but I don't recall it ever happening.

Scene switch once more. This part is again very difficult to describe, and I can't even be sure of most of it. I think I was in my room again, sitting on my bed, and it was night. My lights were on and my windows seemed to be uncovered and I had a bigger, wider view of the outside than I normally would; it was almost like having big skylights. It was clear and midnight blue out. I seemed to be involved in something like reading or listening to music, but I looked up out my (left west?) window, over my bed, and now it was very dark indeed outside, and even in my room, maybe like I had only my desklamp on and things were falling into shadow. I can't be sure of that. But I'm positive I saw first one full or gibbous moon, and then a second identical moon to the side of that, both at the same height in the western sky. At first I got a feeling like, "Oh. There's another moon," almost like it was just a reflection. Then I started to think, "There should only be one moon." Then I started to feel anxious and uneasy. That might have gone on a bit or led into something else, I don't know, but then I received a pseudo-memory (maybe from the omniscient narrator?--though this felt more like a memory of my own) that I had dreamed of this before, or else it had really happened before--though I think it was the former. And that dream had meant something in particular, or something like that...I'm afraid I don't know. It held some significance, some meaning, which was possibly why I was seeing it again. The feeling was such that in this dream it seemed almost like something you see in a dream and something you see in reality were almost the same--my earlier dream of two moons, I was treating that now as if it were as real and significant as something that had really happened. UGH! I can't explain it right. >_< You know how in some more primitive cultures, if a man dreams that he hurt you, the day after he wakes up and comes to you to apologize for hurting you? He knows it was a dream, but it doesn't matter--dreams themselves are real enough to such people to mean much the same thing. Well, this was kind of the same. Though the earlier dream of two moons (which I've never really had, at least not in this specific form) held importance as if it were a real thing, although I knew it had been a dream. I think.

ANYway...I stared up at these moons...I think I was kind of lying on my stomach in these tangled bedsheets...and my mouth twitched in a smile. Not a happy one, just...kind of wryly amused. And the only other thing I know for certain is that associated with this memory of the two-moons dream was the figure of an owl, although I do not know what role or significance this owl had. Along with this also came a feeling of foreboding and impending dread like something bad was going to happen or had already happened (a flashback or a memory?), something which had to do with or was a result of this dream of the two moons and the owl, but I don't know what it was, and as in the part with the Eighties Bus, I acted very neutral and uninvolved, though the feeling of anxiety was greater here since I myself seemed to be involved in it somehow. I wasn't directly involved in the bus thing, that I know of--just watching. But here, seeing as I was the one who had had the two-moons dream so long ago (I felt it was an old dream), this feeling of dread was more personal and had to do with me.

I really get the impression that the two moons and owl had some direct bearing on what was going to go (had already gone?) "wrong" (if anything), so dreaming about them a second time was doubly significant, almost like it was verifying the earlier dream. But I can't be sure if that was the reason why; I just know it was involved with my fate somehow. *sigh* Sorry this is so muddled, I guess you'd have to be there. I never directly saw the owl but I think I thought of my collection of owl statues and figurines with some fondness. The owl in my dream may have been a great horned owl or a barn owl, but I do seem to recall horns. I think Dad might have also been involved in that dream, maybe as somebody with knowledge of the old moons dream. One last thing, I think I got a kind of sardonic feeling from the owl, as if it were darkly amused by what was happening. I don't think it was evil, but it did seem to be amused by something which might cause me harm, whatever it was. But I did not feel any animosity toward the owl myself. The one mental image I did receive of it seemed to be of it as a carved stamped image set between the two moons in the sky. But I didn't really see that, I just thought it.

Personal associations...

I delayed taking note of these so I'm afraid I don't remember them well. I have written down "saturday nite toons--dream from night before this." Yet I don't have a dream recorded about that subject, from that night. I can only guess I'd had an earlier dream about my Saturday-night cartoons and that may have influenced this dream. Me hiding in my room from my relatives might have been influenced by real life, when recently I tried to step outside to get the mail, only to have a neighbor step outside; I waited on the porch, but then another one came out, and then some more...they all just dawdled around in their yard RIGHT when I was trying to check the mail! (Our mailbox is on the same side of the road as their house.) I was very upset and retreated inside until they had all gone. The feeling I got in the dream toward my relatives was the same.

The Wal-Mart parking lot may have come from the night before in real life, when we went shopping at Wal-Mart. The thought about the fair rides may have come from the fact that as we left Wal-Mart I could see and hear the fair rides across the river (the county fair was in town); I'd wanted to go but was unable to. Perhaps the Eighties Bus was influenced by my online browsing the night before, when I had gotten engrossed in an article about Eighties computer games.

The two moons are reminiscent of my "multi-moons" and "sky phenomena" dreams. I'm fond of owls and collect owl figurines and if I had a "spirit animal," I like to think it would be the owl. Not to mention that recently I had seen a hand-carved stamp online, and it was of an owl sitting in a tree. The thought of just remembering an older memory (the forgotten moons dream) may have been influenced by me posting a journal entry online the day before; that entry had to do with me visiting a natural landmark on Mackinac Island, Crack-in-the-Island, when I was little, as I have a memory of that happening, yet nobody in the family remembers it and I would not have gone out there alone. So that left me feeling confused.



2004 Dreams
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