06/26/04
Get Me Out Of This Store!!

I was shopping with Ma in a place that was supposed to be our local KMart or Wal-Mart. I want to say KMart, though in real life our local KMart has REALLY gone downhill and they hardly have anything there anymore; the next-to-last time I checked it out they had some cool jumbo journals which I didn't buy, then the last time I checked they had only a few little pathetic battered journals sitting there, which looked like they'd been tossed and kicked around a few times--like they had been USED...very, very sad. I feel very sorry for our KMart employees; it's like they don't even bother to try anymore. I was so distressed I have decided never to visit there again. :/ Well anyway, if this was KMart in my dream, it was again well stocked like in its heyday and while Ma went off to do her own thing, I went looking for...you guessed it, journals, or journal-type items. In real life last week Wal-Mart restocked their school supply section and I got a couple of cute little journals there and was interested in a dayplanner-type thing that was for 2003, but I could use it as a journal if I wished. I planned to get that this Friday, the day I had the dream. So I guess my anticipation seeped into my subconscious. ^_^

The first thing I remember coming across, which seemed to be as we were heading toward the checkouts, was this big stand in the middle of an aisle (beside the clothing section or something) selling some sort of paper products for kids returning to school. It looked like regular lined notebook paper sold in packages, but this paper had images stamped on each sheet, and I think they had different quotes on them. Maybe some were like writing or journaling prompts or fill-in-the-blanks, but quotes is what pops into my head first. Normally quotes do not inspire me in the least, but whatever this was in my dream struck my interest enough that I wanted to get it. The images were just in outline in one color, maybe red, and seemed to have this cartoony guy on each one; I think he was the mascot for this brand. I picked up one pack and was kind of disappointed at first at how few sheets you actually got; it was maybe half as many as you'd find in a one-subject notebook. Standard sized, though, with holes in it, like refills for a binder. I was almost tempted to put it back when I noticed that another pack beneath it, which I think I had accidentally picked up with this one (thinking they were the same pack), had a different theme to it. I started picking up more packs. Oh! They all had a different quote theme! There were at least five or six different sets! Each set didn't have much paper, but if I bought one of each, and added them all together...

I started picking up one of each. I don't know if I finished doing that but Ma walked by as I was and I was thrilled. I then seemed to, bam, be in another part of the store, in a school supplies-type aisle, and they had these little stationery pads hanging on hooks higher up. The colors were bright and made me think of Lisa Frank products though I'm not sure if they were; maybe they were a knockoff. There was at least one pad that was standard stationery size, then a few smallish ones. One of them, I think the bigger one, featured a cartoony dog, maybe purple or yellow, and I think one of the smaller ones had a dog too. Maybe there was a polar bear on one. At least one of the smaller ones was landscape rather than portrait oriented (wider than it was tall). I was tempted to get all of them but then I decided, what would I do with those smallish ones? They were too small to write real letters on. (They were maybe like index card sized.) I would get the bigger one only.

As I reached up for it Ma passed by and said, "No you don't!" Evidently I was starting to go nuts with the paper products and she was warning me off. ^_^ I pulled the pad down and looked at it, then put it back.

"I'll get it next week!" I promised. But as soon as she continued on her way I changed my mind and pulled the stationery pad down anyway. I'm a brat. ;D

I continued looking around the store, though I started to get bored and decided time was running late and I should get back to Ma, wherever she was. As I thought this I lifted my hand to look at the stationery pad I'd just picked up and noticed that...I'd picked up the wrong one!! It was one of the small ones, maybe with a yellow dog on it. How had that happened? :/ I was so confused. I think I headed back to the stationery aisle and replaced it and got the right one, or else I decided to try to find Ma first. I started then trying to find my way back to her but I kept getting sidetracked by the various papers and writing supplies. At one point I think I walked by some more journal-type things which mildly interested me. Then I walked by a book sale section, and on a display stand were some books facing forward. I think they were aimed at a young audience, like children. They were nice-looking hardcovers but didn't seem like much that would interest me, especially since they were for younger people. (I think of the character Jessica Fletcher (Angela Lansbury) for some reason, so maybe there were some mysteries as well.) However, my attention was arrested by the title of one, which was called Hold On My Heart. That made me pause and look twice. That's the title of a Genesis song I happen to like, although in the dream and even after awakening (until writing this dream down, in fact) I associated it with Phil Collins the solo artist instead. (He IS, however, the one who sings the song, on Genesis's We Can't Dance album.) I stood here looking at it and thought, did Phil Collins write this book? I figured he must not have, though I did wonder if it was connected to him somehow; I like Phil Collins's music. Most of the books had kind of folksy art covers that otherwise would not attract me in the least. I was curious about Hold On My Heart but decided to keep walking. I think there were some saleswomen or something nearby when I was looking at those books.

I kept looking for Ma. But I seemed to just keep wandering around. I tried not to get sidetracked so much, but it seemed that no matter where I went, I was just wandering all over the place! I even tried backtracking the way I'd come, but every time I reached somewhere, the layout of the store had completely rearranged itself somehow! I couldn't even locate the journal or stationery aisles! I kept stopping and looking around myself in growing confusion. I kept trying to tell which section of the store I was in, but everything was so horribly mixed up...it was like being in a maze, or trying to read the same thing twice or dial the phone in a dream! Everything kept changing!

At one point I stopped in an aisle and exclaimed in despair, "The way they set up this store, it's impossible to figure out where you're going!!" And it was true--where the hell were the aisle signs telling me where I was??

I at last emerged from the end of an aisle toward the far side of the store, away from where the paper packs had been earlier, and happened to look up, knowing I would not see anything helpful. Yet toward the back of the store, far to my left and up near the ceiling like near a back exit, I at last noticed a HUGE hanging aisle sign which said something like STATIONERY/COMPOSITION BOOKS. (I can't remember the specifics, and I can't think of why it would say "Composition Books," but I seem to remember the word "Composition," and I know the name had to do with the stationery and journaling supplies.) I believe the arrow on the sign was pointing further to the right, though it could have been the left. Another, unrelated sign was nearby pointing in the opposite direction. I could not see how I had possibly missed such a big sign, nor how I'd wandered so far from it, but at least I had found it!

Still, I felt very, very upset and on the verge of tears as I turned and headed in the direction of the arrow. "Knowing my luck I STILL won't find Ma!" I murmured to myself as I trudged back up the aisle...but I awoke before ever finding out. And yes, the dream left me in a bad mood. It was the exact feeling I get when trying to dial a phone for help in a dream--very frustrated and just about ready to burst into tears.

Fortunately later that day in real life, at the real Wal-Mart...I noticed they had AGAIN restocked their journal section and I came home with four very nice journals and a different but even nicer dayplanner than I had expected. Woot! ^_^



2004 Dreams
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