05/22/03
MY FIRST LUCID DREAM! :D

I almost forgot I had this! *LOL*

This was from my nap. And looking at it--even right after I had it I knew it was not very dramatic at all. But it was my first official lucid dream, and to me that's good enough.

I can't even remember all of the dream. I do know that I was in my bedroom, sitting on my bed, doing something with an audiocassette tape. I can't remember which tape it was; I think it was a music tape and I know I had listened to it recently and it had been just fine. However, as I glanced over toward it (it was in front of me, near my left knee--I was facing my southwest window), I noticed that some of the tape had unreeled itself out of the plastic casing. This surprised me. How had that happened? I couldn't see it clearly as there were some other things scattered around on my bed, perhaps other tapes; I reached over to nudge something aside to get a better look. And now I noticed that rather than just being unreeled, the tape was CUT and dangling from the cartridge!

"Oh no!" I picked it up in great dismay. How had this happened? It must have snapped during playback or rewind or something. Looking at it more carefully, I did notice now that the "cut" took place right between the brown/black part of the tape--the playable part--and the clear "starter" part--the blank part. Yes, it must have snapped on its own. At least it was right at the beginning/end of the tape so perhaps I could fix it with minimal damage to the music itself. I just had to make sure not to wind it back up so it retracted into the cartridge and I'd never be able to pull it out again!

But then I think I looked back down at my bed. And in surprise I noticed a little piece of brown tape snipped off, perhaps an inch or two long. I knew it must have come from the same cassette. I picked it up, then noticed another, and another. And more. And MORE. I kept finding more little snipped-off parts of tape and kept picking them up, my panic growing. Who had DONE this to my tape and WHY? Yes, I realize it was only a cassette, but some albums are hard to find on cassette nowadays and it greatly upset me. I have to point out that the time of day seemed to change in here somewhere, maybe in the next part. It had seemed kind of like nighttime before, but then it grew to be day.

I picked up a bunch of pieces of this snipped tape and looked down at my bed where yet more pieces lay. The tears were welling up in my eyes--I felt so horrible that this had happened--so I suddenly yelled, "THIS IS A DREAM!"

I blinked my eyes. And bam! Instead of many snippets of tape upon the bed, there now rested one longish one, nowhere near as long as the entire reel, but that didn't matter. I gasped in shock on seeing this abrupt change. Things change like that only in dreams. And as this had happened RIGHT after I'd cried out that this was a dream...then I had to be right. I was dreaming!

My anxiety was replaced with joy. I then had a feeling of falling sideways toward my bed, to the left. As I fell, lots of different things and sensations went through my head. For one thing, I thought, "Since I'm dreaming, I should try to do something I've never controlled before. Like flying!" I think I spread out my arms and wanted to fly, but this feeling of intense anxiety arose in my chest--not the same anxiety as before, but very overpowering. It was a fear of falling, which I was indeed doing. I still sat on my bed. Nevertheless, I got a sudden rushing feeling as of flying even though I didn't go anywhere, and that gave me a small feeling of success. It was like flying for a split second without leaving my body, which was still sinking rapidly toward the bed. And the anxiety DID die down slightly when I insisted on reminding myself that this was just a dream and I could NOT get hurt.

I then remembered that once you've acquired sudden lucidity in a dream, it often "ruins" the dream by making you wake up. Drat! Just as this happened the flying feeling vanished and I noticed I was now cuddling my toy bunny under my right arm. I had been cuddling him that way while I was napping. And as I hit the bed on my left side, sinking into it, I came conscious upon my left side on the couch, just as I'd fallen asleep, toy bunny under my right arm. And even though I wasn't yet fully awake, I gave a huge grin inside. That was very weird and very fulfilling! Now if only I could do something more DRAMATIC than just fall over! ^_^



2003 Dreams
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