04/08/01
Daughter Against Drunk Driving
Well, I've been putting off putting in type what I've been dreaming lately, so the memories aren't as vivid as they usually are. As such this'll be a boring one.
The night BEFORE last my dream concerned my dad getting drunk and then driving. I'm not certain how it started; I was in the house and it was summer or near it, I can't recall what I was doing but I went to look out the front window and had a clearer-than-it-could-be-in-real-life view of the dead-end road to the northwest of my house. I saw my dad's Ford Explorer driving down it. First he'd weave to ONE side, then he'd weave to the OTHER side, then there was a car coming from the other way and he got right in its path, and didn't pull out until the last minute. I was getting ready to freak out--he'd kill himself if he weren't more careful!--and finally I become SO LIVID I left the house to go STOP him.
First, though, I had to find my sandals. Erg. I had a bit of trouble locating the right ones--I don't know, I just COULDN'T go out barefoot--and then left the house and went running across the highway to the road.
Herein followed a nice exciting part where I was just RUNNING and RUNNING down the road, following Dad. I always seem to have trouble running in my dreams. I can leap as gracefully as a deer, never running out of breath, but I hardly ever seem to GET anywhere. And I often have to run in some strange fashion. As a result, I was sort of running on all fours this time. I kept bending over and pushing against the ground with my hands, feeling the cool soil--this was the only way I could get myself to move fast enough, it's like I was moving in slow motion, and I HAD to catch up with Dad. So I kind of jogged/ran/trotted/whatever until he finally pulled in at a house near the end of the road and stopped.
My uncle lived down here, in my dream. Dad was paying him a visit. Dad hates this uncle in real life so I doubt this would really happen. ;) I caught up and he'd gone inside the house; when I got inside he was sitting at a table with my uncle, laughing and talking, very obviously drunk. (My uncle wasn't drunk, though he always acts like it in real life.) It had been daytime outside, but inside the house it was dark and cramped, except for a light over the table--a little round dinner-type-table with an ugly white-patterned "cloth" (actually that plastic stuff) over it, and a harsh light shining down on it. It looked as if they should be playing poker or something. I had the feeling there were lots of rooms somewhere that I couldn't see, rooms filled with stuff, rooms leading to rooms leading to more rooms...I'd best leave off describing that as it'll just get me into a description of an old recurring theme of mine. In any case, I went to the table and demanded Dad's attention.
"If you want to get back home or go anywhere else," I said sharply, "then you'd better give me the keys because *I* will be driving!!"
THIS is ridiculous. I hardly know how to drive. And most certainly not an SUV! I probably wouldn't be able to reach the gas pedal! But I was just so MAD at him for being so stupid that I would rather have risked my OWN life driving the thing than allow HIM to do it again.
He was slow getting the point but I think I was so strict about it that it finally got through. Both he and my uncle were rather surprised, to say the least.
I had other dreams that night but I don't recall them now.
Brushfire Panic
Last night the first dream centered on a wildfire that had started in the field across the highway, directly to the west of our house. We were all at home--Ma, Dad, myself, and even my brother, though he lives in Georgia now. I believe it was summer, though the trees seemed bare and everything was brown--it was dry and hot. We were all busy, walking around doing things. Someone noticed something outside and drew our attention to it, then moved on as if it didn't matter. I took a closer look and saw that it DID matter. A brushfire had started out in the field. "Oh my," I said. At first it was just one smaller one--nothing much to worry about--but then I looked and saw that there was another one, and another, and they were spreading fast, from north to south. I knew that somehow they'd reach our house (in real life though--how?--wouldn't the highway stop them?), and we had to evacuate immediately.
I had to convince the others of this first. They were too preoccupied and apathetic to care much. I practically had to get them off their butts and kept harping about the importance of the situation.
Finally someone--Dad?--took charge. I knew the drill (even though we don't have one--if our house really ever does catch on fire, I'll probably roast to death). I had to grab what few things I could--supposedly the only things within reach--and we had to leave, taking only what we could carry without falling over. Well, what I wanted wasn't within reach, it was in my bedroom, down the hallway. But still...those brushfires still had a ways to go yet, so maybe if I hurried... There was the sense of urgency there, and I knew it was potentially stupid, but I kept having the feeling that if I just went FAST enough, I could get out of there in time. Like trying to beat the train when crossing a railroad track, I guess.
I resolved to take three things only.
First I grabbed the cat.
Then I went to my room and grabbed my favorite blanket.
Then I grabbed one more thing--but I can't remember what it was. I have the feeling it was pretty much irreplaceable, at least in my mind. So while it may have been a CD or a cassette of music I like, it may not have been, as those are replaceable. Was it one of my stories? I'm not sure, I just know I could carry it in one hand. With these three objects, I left behind everything else that was mine and left the house to join the others, who had likewise grabbed whatever THEY could carry.
I was upset, but not NEARLY as upset as I'd be in real life--rather I was more RESOLVED.
We were all outside getting in the Explorer now. At first there was the sense of urgency as we tried to get everything in the vehicle just right and then to get in ourselves, but then we were dawdling so much that it didn't seem like an emergency anymore. In fact, we were NITPICKING over where things should go! None of us had even gotten in the dang vehicle yet! Plus there was a lot of stuff in the back--bags?--it seemed to be lots of food supplies, like we were just getting ready to go on a camping/picnic trip. All four of us, and the cat. If we would only get the stuff put inside right and then get in ourselves! It's like we completely forgot all about the fire that had prompted us to move in the first place.
Lending A Helping Paw
One dream I can (sort of) remember is now so vague and was already so strange to begin with that I can't describe it adequately. It had to do with my cat and my (former) hamster. Somehow, the cat helped the hamster, and then the hamster helped her, or vice-versa, or maybe she just helped the hamster and he was grateful. I just remember a part with Pepper (the cat) in the kitchen, lying on her left side in front of the stove, facing the dresser (we have a sort of dresser in our kitchen), and we had to have her assist the hamster--she had him in her mouth, COMPLETELY in her mouth, and she was lying in front of a mousetrap or something. She opened her mouth, I (?) opened the trap, and Pepper kind of spat him into it, and I could see his little tush wiggling around. BUT--he was not trapped. For some reason, this is what we WANTED to happen. By spitting him out into the trap or whatever it was, Pepper was helping my hamster do something he needed to do, and both he and I were grateful for her assistance. I remember petting and congratulating her for being so smart.
Told you it was strange.
And I suppose that's all for tonight...
...
Don't you have dreams that involve you being empowered and in control, ones that involve mostly pure joy & happiness? Dreams with me snapping at my dad are about as empowered as I get--I could NOT do that in real life. Usually when I feel "powerful" I'm "roleplaying"--I feel like an actor in a show. I don't think I've ever had one with pure joy and happiness but then again I don't think I know what that feels like anyway so I couldn't judge. ^_^
Any serene, calm and peaceful dreams? Those usually seem to involve an aspect of fear.
Any dreams where you destroy things or create stuff? Hm...I can't think of any. I might have wrecked things in a few dreams, but I don't remember creating. Can't say.
Do you feel that you are more of an observant [sic] or a participant in your dreams? I can't really say on that one either. It just happens as it happens.
2001 Dreams
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