A Jacket Without A Back(et)

The night before yesterday (or rather I should say the day) I had several dreams but remembered only portions, and so didn't type them up. One of them involved me getting dressed to go somewhere, I believe, so I was in my room trying some things on. One of the things I tried on was this special jacket. It had sleeves and it had a front but it didn't have a back. The back consisted merely of a couple of straps that held the front part together. It seemed to be made of brown leather, though it may have been lighter (light-colored cloth) at first. I considered this very interesting; it wasn't my jacket, I was just trying it on, so I'm not sure whose it was. I put it on (it was only THEN that I realized it didn't have a back), and it seemed I was wearing it on top of some other kind of leather clothing, like a black leather jacket. I never wear leather; too rich for my blood. ^_^ I thought that was certainly an interesting jacket, though.

This dream took place at night.

Rawhide Knives

A dream fragment from the day before yesterday consisted of me having some kind of interaction with a member of [the site where this was originally posted], I think; at first it was one user, then it changed so it was another. I remember at one point I was looking at the computer screen and doing something interactive--LITERALLY interactive--it was like touching the monitor caused some action to happen, or I could reach through it. I seem to remember something about folders or dividers. This other user wanted me to do something with him and I was kind of nervous about it but went along with it. I started collecting something, perhaps from these online folders; then we were in my room and I was dumping everything I'd collected onto my bed. It was a large collection of knives, all shapes and sizes. This is strange because at first--and maybe all throughout the dream--the knives were weird and "unfinished" looking--they looked like rawhide bones that dogs chew on. But I knew they were supposed to be knives belonging to this user, I'd collected all of them and gathered them together, now I dumped them for his inspection and we were going to do something with them. Maybe it had something to do with [the site]; I feel as if we were plotting something.

This dream took place at night.

Runaway Blimp

Last night's dream is somewhat confusing as well but I thought I'd try...for some reason I was walking along in this small city in late evening. It seemed to be summery out so perhaps it was around nine or nine-thirty at night, pretty much dusk. It may have clouded over, or perhaps it was just because the sun had set, but everything was going dim gray-blue. The city seemed slightly bigger than my hometown, but not much different; perhaps it WAS my hometown, with how comfortable I felt walking around alone. (I don't even walk around my hometown alone in real life!) I was downtown but it wasn't all cars and buildings; there were plenty of trees around, it was very nice and homey. Some other people were out having fun, talking, playing basketball and such; I think one of them was [the webmaster at the site where this was originally posted]. (Strange.) I passed a school basketball court and came to a city park, and as I got close I realized it was the veterans' memorial park. (We have one of these in our town.) I stopped just short of entering it--I wanted to walk through it to get somewhere--because I felt that would be disrespectful--it was sort of like a cemetery too, I guess. But I decided that if I at least kept the veterans in my thoughts as I did so, it wouldn't be too disrespectful for me to pass through, as long as I watched my step. So I circled around to the very edge of the park--now the corner of it was to my left in front of me--and started to climb up this embankment. The park itself was now raised several feet from the ground, a little bit of a grassy knoll ( ^_^ ) at the edge which I had to climb up. There was a stone of some kind there, a memorial stone, worn by time; it was a nice park, the weather was warm, and I wanted to stop and take a look around the place while I was on my way through. Everything was so peaceful and interesting. I had no anxiety at all about being on my own in a seemingly unfamiliar (though somehow familiar to me--I knew what the park was) city at night.

I guess I got into the park and started on my way through it, but I don't remember what happened then. Somehow I seemed to have a memory lapse and came to just outside, or near, what appeared to be a football stadium. There was a game going on. My view of it, my exact position/location, was hazy and indeterminate, I just know that I could see the bleachers from high above, could hear the people cheering, could even see or hear the people in the announcers' booth calling the plays. I felt confused and wondered where I was, how I'd gotten there. Something suddenly went weird but then righted itself; I noticed that Chris Farley (the actor) was with me now, and maybe someone else. I eventually realized that we were in the Goodyear blimp and we were hovering above the stadium, and Chris Farley was in charge of the blimp; so of course things were going wrong. The blimp kept tipping UPSIDE-DOWN, somebody said; that was what had caused everything to go so weird a moment before. Chris Farley was throwing a fit and trying to figure out how to fix things. I felt a bit relieved at least knowing what was going on (even if not how I got there--I have the feeling I was shanghaied, maybe from the park), and having an explanation as for the strange feeling I'd gotten when the blimp had turned upside down--even as I thought this it did so again, and I had to grab onto something (it felt like big folds of cloth) to avoid falling off and into the stadium below. I FELT the fear of heights and FELT AS IF I'd fall to my death if I didn't hang on; I didn't know it for a certainty. And as the blimp righted itself yet again and I thought a bit longer, suddenly the situation just didn't make any sense to me anymore.

I mean, c'mon, a blimp, turning upside-down? The blimp part is the part that floats, above the passengers' section--the what, the basket? It just seemed to be PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE for the basket to get up higher than the balloon part, at least on its own, without very high winds or some such--this blimp was supposedly tilting and tipping ON ITS OWN, like a capsizing boat. It just didn't seem like it could really happen. So, I deduced that I must not be in much danger at all, considering this was impossible. (Weird feeling, using logic in a dream! ^_^ ) I'm not sure if it was this realization that ended that part of the dream and my involvement in the blimp fiasco, but in any case, the dream shifted from there, once more, I'm not certain how or why.

This dream then shifted into "Treading Water."

Treading Water

This dream seemed to have shifted out of "Runaway Blimp."

I ended up on a boat, I believe, somewhat far out from what looked to be a big city beach. The water was gorgeous turquoise through teal through blue. It was a motorboat I was on, with some other people; the shore was within sight, but it was rather far away, and it would take a good swim to get back. (By city beach, I mean the kind you see on TV, those HUGE beaches just crammed with people, within view of a large city.) The blimp dream, "Runaway Blimp," had seemed to be at night or at least dusk; now it was the middle of the day, the sun beating down on us. It was simply gorgeous out. For some reason I was now on this boat with some other people and we had to get off. Perhaps there was a problem with it; I feel that SOMETHING was wrong, even if I'm not sure what. I wasn't PANICKED, but there was an air of anxiety there. I felt I had to keep a "poker face" so nobody else could see through me. It's like I was pretending to be somebody I'm not, roleplaying again. The people with me seemed to be adults--I sort of remember a red-haired woman, maybe in her late thirties or early forties, and I can't really describe the look on her face. Not smug. Not sly, either. "Knowing," perhaps. She had a KNOWING look on her face, like she knew something and wasn't going to tell it. I feel that all of us were looking this way--we were all "in on" something--perhaps not all together--but nobody was speaking.

We got down to the back of the boat, and here's what's funny, I never remember actually being ON the boat, but rather BELOW it, as if I were in the water already. Yet I wasn't. I was getting ready to get in it. Only NOW did I get anxious. I can't swim, and water freaks me out. Yet I knew I had to get in eventually--the boat was sinking, or unsafe, or something. Still, I hesitated.

Then it was like something else was in the water--some floating thing, perhaps a toy of some sort. It was meant to coax me in and I took the bait, more because I knew I had to and because I knew the people were trying in whichever way they knew how to coax me off. I had to get off the boat to help them, in a way--even if it just meant getting out of the way so the boat could be taken care of. I remember touching the water with my foot, I think; then I was in it, up to my shoulders. I was floating in it, bobbing around, and having no trouble keeping my head up, but I still felt anxious, as if I could sink or lose control any moment--rather the same feeling I had on the tipsy blimp in "Runaway Blimp," like I had to HOLD ONTO something. Still, I kept my poker face, for everyone else's sake; I didn't want them to know I was ready to panic inside.

Another difficult thing to describe, it's like not all of my body was there. I don't remember feeling my whole body under the water, only part of it--the same way I don't remember physically being on the boat, but rather being beside and below it, yet not in the water. Kind of like my lower half wasn't there. (I felt similar in the first part of "Runaway Blimp," kind of floating around and not really knowing what my exact position was.) Too difficult to describe adequately.

I was "treading water" (even though I didn't exactly feel that), perhaps with a flotation device or a lifejacket, and the others were getting off now. I may have had something, some kind of trinket or device, in my hand; I then looked down in the water to see if I could see the bottom. My feet weren't touching bottom (at least, it didn't feel like it) but I could vaguely see it and a few rocks and objects far underneath. Now, I think I still held this object--whatever it was (it was small, that's all I know--perhaps a locket, though I know it was important, perhaps technologically) in my hand, and I don't remember getting rid of it or dropping it--but I was looking for it on the bottom. Still with that "knowing" feeling. Almost like, "It's there, I know I'll find it," even though it WASN'T there, as I was holding onto it!! This is so maddeningly difficult to describe. I think I was considering dumping the object just so I could go retrieve it from the bottom, even though the water was scaring me. Man...this dream IS confusing, all my thoughts and actions and observations were conflicting with each other, yet I wasn't confused. The only thing in this part of the dream that DID get to me was my fear of the water. Everything else seemed normal.

I think there was a bit more after that, with us getting off the boat and being rescued in some way, but I can't remember the rest; this was too hard to outline anyway!!

2001 Dreams